STAY AWAY FROM THE LIGHT!!

Oh Monday, if I never knew ye, would I like you?  Would you and I have a different relationship if you were known by any other name than Monday?  I know I shouldn't blame you....but when everyone else is sleeping, you sneak, hiding slyly against the walls...waiting for my first breath in the first seconds of the day you claim as your own.  Monday, sweet Monday....we gotta talk!

The days rolls by, each beginning at midnight and bidding farewell at approximately the same twenty four hours later....Oh, if you only knew exactly how true that was....

At exactly 12:01 am this Monday morning, I was awakened by the sound of the alarm counting down to loudness.  What the?  I stayed in bed deciding whether or not I was dreaming or if it was real.  Then I heard the garage door open and the sound of footsteps (in retrospect, the footsteps were panicked....during the experience ....it was some big, burly guy looking for someone to be his girlfriend in jail).  I jumped out of bed, in perfect rhythm to the sound of Felix's breathing.

I got to the alarm pad just as it started wailing, when I heard someone else punch in the code and the alarm silenced.  Not only was it a big, bad burly man....but a smart one as well.  As I looked around for a feather duster to use as a weapon, I heard the familiar sounds of Savannah crying (No, Savannah I'm not saying you cry too much, I'm saying you are 13) as the footsteps worked their way up to my room.

I ran to her (in a very motherly way, of course) to find out was wrong.  She had been dreaming she was being held captive and managed to escape.  She decided to make a break for it through the garage...when the alarm started beeping, she woke up, shut the garage and turned it off.  Oh, honey.  Being the extraordinary pillar of "Mother of the Year-dom-ness" that I am, I threw some blankets at her and had her make a bed on my floor so I could go back to sleep.

And once I slept and woke to my alarm, it was still Monday.  I got Savannah up and the boys up and let Baylee sleep for a while (since we were going to the doctors anyways).  After the boys were ready and on carpool-watch, I noticed my neighbor out the window.  Sadly, she was aware it was Monday too.  As they were going to the car, one of the kids locked her garage door, locking her out of her house without keys.

No problem....I can do carpool!  I started my car and got the boys herded in the right direction.  As the car was warming up, I woke up Baylee.  Back to the car..."Boys, get in.  I said, boys, get in.  GET IN THE CAR."  At which point my neighbor came back...keys in hand and said, "I'm driving!"  AWESOME.

I got the boys over to her car, when (much to my dismay), Caleb decided to have a meltdown in the middle of the street, "But I want YOUUUUUUUU to take me to school...in YOURRRRRRRRR car!"  It's nice to be needed.  Noah, however, did not need me and went with the neighbors while I drove Caleb to school.

As soon as I got home, I got Baylee ready and we left for her doctor appointment.  We were kind of dreading it, but it turned out good....and I use the term loosely.  We have six months for Baylee's feet to finish correcting on their own, or it's time for surgery.  I look at it as good news because now, I don't have to start freaking out until (February, March, April, May, June, July) July.  I don't have to freak until July.  I can do that.

We make the drive back to the valley from Salt Lake and I totally miss the exit...so we get to go to Orem and turn around.  That's always fun.  I drop Baylee off, stop for a quick chat with the schools director (find out why my Kindergartner got lectured for beating up the eighth graders) and head back out.

As I am walking to the car, I smell gas...okay I didn't at first...but once the recess monitor pointed it out...I could TOTALLY smell it.  I go back and talk to the director, the gas company has already check it and we're good.  So back to the car I go.

I go the store, completely forget all about couponing and spend WAY more money than I planned.  Such is life....at least, such is my life.

I get home and decide that now would be a good time to tape and paint the trim in the basement.  Of course it is.  I have 45 WHOLE minutes until Kindergarten carpool.  I finished taping much faster than I had anticipated and of course went right to painting.

I get to carpool, drop the kids off, take my kid home and tell him if he wants lunch right this second he's on his own...If he can wait 20 minutes I'll make it.  Yeah, he waited.  I finished painting the trim (coat 1 of course) and made lunch.

While I ate, I hunkered down at my computer and worked for an hour or so.  Yes, that would be my J-O-B...which I love, so it was an incredibly welcome distraction from life.

As soon as I am done with work, I go and do coat number 2.  Don't give me grief about letting the paint dry....I have a system and it's not your trim, so ZIP IT!

Savannah came home just in time to watch me finish up.  I hurry and take the tape off so we can get to piano lessons.

We love piano lessons.  It helps we have one of the very best teachers in the world.  If she can teach me (or at least make the attempt), then she has to be good.

Savannah was about halfway through her lesson when my phone rang.  It was Noah....having an asthma attack....having a REALLY, REALLY bad asthma attack.  I keep him calm enough to get to his inhaler....no reaction.  Not good.  I walk him through setting up his nebulizer and start a treatment.  At this point, I realize that I can't get to him fast enough.  I call Felix, who immediately gets up, walks out of a meeting and to his boy.

In the middle of all of that, the school calls.  Carpool left her.  Really?  Okay.  So I call Noah back and stay on the phone with him to make sure he hasn't passed out.  "Noah, please grunt every few seconds so I know you're still with me."  At which point, I listen to a beautiful symphony that sounds a little something like, "Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." He didn't just grunt, he moaned.....and moaned.....and moaned.

Felix called to tell me he was getting close.  I switched back to Noah who was trying to explain the feeling of the life being crushed out of him.  There is nothing quite as surreal as listening to your baby suffocate.  Helpless doesn't describe it.

I ask Noah if he wants me to have Grandma come up and help him.  He is such a smart boy, he decided that he didn't want Grandma to see his room, so he would rather suffer alone.  I totally get that.

I have him go and grab an ice cube and sit on the porch to wait for his dad.  Once Felix gets him, he calls me to tell me that he is worse than we thought and they are going to the ER.  After a few minutes, Felix calls back to tell me that he has started breathing better and they are going to InstaCare instead.

I, at this point, am heading to get Baylee at school.  I pick her up, drop the kids off and go to meet Felix and Noah at the doctor.

At his lowest point, his oxygen was at 80....that's bad....that's very, very bad.  But after another treatment, he started breathing better and we got a prescription for a new nebulizer....YAY!  There is always a good side, sometimes you have to look, really, really hard, but it's there.

We decided to go to the home health clinic and pick up the nebulizer right away.  This one is batter powered and has a car charger....I love technology!

Noah stayed in the car and continued moaning....he would make awesome tracks for the Haunted Mansion at Disneyland.  It was however, broken up by an occasional gasp of air.  "What was that?"  "Oh, I keep forgetting to breath...it really, really, hurts."  That sucks.

So Monday, as I sit here thinking about my (your) day, I think you can understand why I find it difficult to love you.  I want to love you.  I want, more importantly, to understand you.  I think I have bad days on Tuesdays, perhaps even an odd Friday or Saturday....but there is something about you that just doesn't sit well with me.  In the meantime, just know....I'm watching, and waiting for your next appearance, even though I know you have 4 and half hours left of today....  And just for reference, I don't get mad, I get even.

Lessons Learned
1. STRS (sound it out...it sounds like stress) is a 4 letter word.
2. Everyone has (thus far) made it out alive.  That means it's a good day.
3. Asthma is not nice.
4. Noah should do Halloween tracks.
5. This is yet another reminder for me to be grateful for the little things...like breathing.  Autonomic functions are TOTALLY underrated.