Thursday, December 24, 2009

Busted!

Due to my lack of mobility, we made a few changes to Christmas this year. Nothing major. Usually Felix and I stay up late on Christmas Eve, wrap all of the presents and put everything under the tree. Because I had to have so much help, we have been wrapping a little bit at a time and putting things under the tree because there was NO WAY I was going to make it on Christmas Eve.

Last night, I'm laying down with my boot off (shhhhhhh, don't tell the doctor) and Caleb comes in holding his drum set. Yeah, that would be the one that just got wrapped and put under the tree. Maybe teaching him to read isn't such a good idea. And he says...Mom, look what I got for Christmas!

Because I am trying not to laugh and because I can't get up, I call Felix who walks in and Caleb proudly tells him, "Look Dad! I got drums for Christmas". Felix explained that it wasn't Christmas and took it away.

And the tantrum of the century ensued. After watching the equivalent of the Tasmanian Devil with PMS...I am grateful my walls are still standing. We made him go and pick another gift from under the tree that he had to give back. So he went down started opening presents so he could decide what he was going to give back.

Felix was able to stop him before he got too far...but still...he is the first and only of our children BRAVE enough to even attempt opening Christmas presents before Christmas. And he didn't even try to be sneaky about it.

So while he was in time out, we had everyone else bring all of the presents to my room to remove the temptation of the holiday season!

And for all of you 'Children Cruelty Police' out there....he's gonna get his stuff back. Relax...no need to call child protective services!

Lessons Learned
1. There really was a reason why we waited to put presents under the tree. Who knew?
2. I forgot how hard it was to be 4.
3. I forgot how hard it was to be 4 with older sibling(s) who didn't make things any easier for you.
4. Now we get to lug everything down on Christmas Eve anyway. I'm thinking of using a sheet and creating a slide.
5. Perhaps we need to work on the reason for the season!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Say No To Drugs

Okay...even when drugs are pharmaceutical and approved by doctors there have to be limits.

Last Wednesday I had ankle surgery...no big deal...not gonna go into it...more than I expected...but learned a valuable lesson about drugs.

I was in recovery and ready to go home at about 2:30. My kind after care staff didn't want me to be uncomfortable so between 12:30 and 2:30 I had 2 shots of morphine and 2 Percocets. I was feeling pretty dang good so I started asking to go home. My sweet over-protective nurse said as soon as I can go to the bathroom I can go. Well, get me some crutches, I want out of here.

We head (okay hobble) to the bathroom where I trip over the nurses feet with my crutches because she is so close to me. We get to the bathroom, where she won't let Felix in to help me. She was so sweet, she wanted to do it herself! Ummm, no. I have space bubble issues I'll take care of it.

I get comfortable in the bathroom and she starts talking, talking, talking. Okay, stop talking. Then the wave of dizziness and nausea hit like a thundering brick wall. I grab onto the rail next to me, holding on for dear life! The nurse runs out to get me some alcohol swabs to sniff (which by the way really do help with nausea) and while the slow closing hinge takes its time to close the door I practiced my parade wave at all of the strangers looking at me, while holding on for dear life. The nurse came back in, I waved again.

After the nausea had passed I began raining on myself because I was sweating so badly! Really, it was like I was raining! Gross. The nurse starts talking again and apparently I have a shy bladder. So she has a trick, she leaves to get and get it and yes! Success...but only after I waved at the people in the hall again!

I go to wash my hands and I am standing there for maybe a whole 20 seconds when I tell the nurse to go and get the wheelchair and collapse over the sink. The nurse freaks out and throws my IV bag into the garbage. Yes INTO the garbage...she fishes it out and then goes to get the wheelchair. By that time Felix knows there is something going on. He says me laying on the sink and picks me up and puts me in the wheelchair. We head back to my hole in the wall recovery room, Felix safely driving me in the wheelchair, the nurse holding my IV. Someone stops the nurse to talk and as Felix continues driving and my IV line begins to stretch. Rather than wait for my IV to be ripped out my arm, I gently tug on it to remind the nurse there is someone attached to the bag she is holding!

We safely make it back and the solution to my sudden dizzy/nausea thing is of course, more drugs. Demoral and Phenergren. At this point I have had all of these drugs within a three hour time period. So what happens next...my blood pressure drops and I can no longer get enough oxygen. Great.

So my two hour stay in recovery has turned into a 4+ hour recovery. Kids: Don't do drugs.

Lessons Learned
1. Too much is too much.
2. It's hard to have bad feelings about the nurse because she was so sweet to the point of too much, but so sweet.
3. My foot is fat and ugly.
4. I still haven't looked at it.
5. I hate crutches!

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Someone Just Moved to the Naughty List

Dear Santa,

I know you are just my parents and you might still have everyone else fooled. I am not that gullable and if you think otherwise try me. Let us just get to the part where you get me my presents. Just get me a $50-100 dollar iTunes gift card.

From Your Beloved Son,

Noah

No adjustments to spelling, grammar or content by the editor (i.e. the mommy)
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